Friday, October 12, 2012

The Pretty Puppet


She loved the puppet with the big blue eyes best. If only she didn't look so sad. The young girl clapped her hands as the marionettes began to dance, her black curls bouncing as she did.
"Stay close," her mother said as they walked away after the show. "A child went missing during the fair yesterday, and still hasn't been found."
They stopped at a game booth. Her dad patted her on the head. "I'm going to win you that big stuffed dog."  
The girl couldn't stop thinking about the puppet with the blue eyes.
Were the puppets still on the stage, she wondered. She wanted to see them again, maybe even hold her favorite. She looked up. Her parents were leaning over the booth, intent on the game. They didn't notice when she stepped away.
The marionette tent looked deserted, the stage, empty. Disappointed, the young girl turned away, intending to return to her parents. A soft lullaby began to play. It seemed to drift through a flap on the side of the tent. Enchanted, she drew near, lifted the flap, and peered within. She just wanted to see the puppets one more time. She slipped inside. She wouldn't stay long. She didn't want her parents to worry.

Darkness cloaked the fairground. "Can we watch? Please," a young girl with long red hair pleaded as she and her parents walked by the stage where the evening's last marionette show was about to begin.
Once seated, she smiled up at her parents, and then smoothed out her new pink dress.
Her favorite was the puppet with the bouncing black curls. If only she didn't look so sad.
After the show, the young girl's parents began debating dinner options. A lullaby drifted to the girl's ears. It seemed to be coming from the tent. Maybe the pretty puppet with the black curls was in there. She wanted to get a closer look, maybe even hold her.
Glancing back, she saw a flap on the side of the tent. Her parents shouldn't mind if she went and peeked inside. She could see her parents were still talking when she reached the flap. She didn't want to interrupt, and she'd only be a minute. Lifting it, she peered within. The lullaby wrapped around her and she slipped inside, unnoticed. 

***************************************************

Dear readers, this is my first attempt at flash fiction. As you will see when you read through the contest details below, this is intended to be a darker piece, not my usual style, but it was so much fun to write. As a newbie to flash fiction, I hope I was able to capture the essence of the challenge for your enjoyment.
Thank you to the loveliest of ladies, Sophie Moss, and Diane Reed, who inspired me to try my hand at it. And, thank you to the creative, awesome, Anna Meade (@ruanna3) of the enchanting Yearning for Wonderland blog for sponsoring the Behind The Curtain contest that egged me on.

24 comments:

  1. Love this! So creepy. You did a great job getting into the little girls' heads. I was right there with them, hearing the lulluby, wanting just one last peek. Poor little things!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks, Sophie. I can see how one could get hooked on flash fiction. First time is always the biggest step :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. AHHHHHH! I had no idea you could write something so eloquent yet so sinister!! This had the feeling of a Victrola playing a lovely lullaby that mysteriously keeps repeating over and over until it starts to mesmerize you--even hypnotize you--into going somewhere you don't want to go... Well done, Patricia! : )

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Diane, and for all your support. I had a lot of fun writing out of my normal element. A good way to stretch.

      Delete
  4. Patricia, we both chose puppets for our first attempts at flash fiction! I really enjoyed this story. You captured the curiousity of the little girls very well. Creepy!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Lori. Good minds think alike, eh? When I was a little girl, puppets always frightened me a bit. Guess some of it stayed with me :)

      Delete
  5. Fantastically creepy - all the hallmarks of great horror and a great flash story too!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much, Meg. I think I may have picked up the bug ;)

      Delete
  6. So enthralling...I love the style in which you wrote this, wrapping it all up so well...loved it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm glad you liked it, Lisa. I'm working my way through all the other posts whenever I get a few extra minutes and loving all of them! :)

      Delete
  7. Hard to believe this is your first attempt. Well done. That was fascinating. Bet you find it addictive - most of us do!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much, Cameron. I'm already finding it so! Guess I'm in trouble, but it really was fun.

      Delete
  8. Puppets can be very creepy. Especially the ones with long read hair...

    Very nice!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, I've always found them a little scary. I'm looking forward to reading your piece and all the others over the next few days!

      Delete
  9. Patricia, I'm so glad you participated in the flash fiction contest! I too enjoyed how you took the innocence of the children and the sounds of a lullabye in an altogether eerie direction. To me there has always been something rather creepy about marionettes to begin with. So glad you took that notion to the next level. :))

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aww, thanks, Jo-Anne. I really went back and forth as to whether I wanted to jump into this or not. But was inspired by a couple others who took the plunge.
      It's weird how many people find marionettes so creepy, isn't it?

      Delete
  10. Good story. Nothing so dark as the lullaby that lures children.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Louise. I agree, the preying on a child's innocence is one of the most disturbing things I can think of.

      Delete
  11. Always excited to see someone new try flash. I loved the hypnotic rhythms of the story. You should definitely keep writing flash. Thanks for entering!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much, Anna. You came up with wonderful inspiration! I had a blast :)

      Delete
  12. Very eerie. I loved the story! So glad you decided to participate!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much. It was a lot of fun, and I'm really enjoyoing working my way through all the other entries. So much talent!

      Delete
  13. Well written, but spooky. Good job.

    Now, on a serious note, I'll have to report you to the Blog Hop Police. C.R. Haitt tagged you and you were suppose to post today. Since you didn't, you can expect a visit from them. Do you prefer, silver, black, or gold handcuffs? :-)

    I'll stop by some other time.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. EeeeK! Dana, thanks so much for stopping by. I've been somewhat out of commission the last few weeks. Geeesh, I didn't even know I was on a Blog Hop! Do those handcuffs come in pink, with diamonds? If not, the gold would be lovely. And thank you for your comments on Pretty Puppet, I'm glad you enjoyed. <3

      Delete

If you'd like to follow me on Twitter, just Click the little blue bird!

Twitter Widgets
Powered By Vistaprint

The Kindle Book Review

The Kindle Book Review
Semi-Finalist Best Indie Books of 2012 - Romance Category